Sure, stuff is nice.
I like stuff.
But you know what our deepest wish is?
To be seen, heard, and acknowledged.
You aren’t going to see this on a Black Friday sale, but perhaps this is the best gift you could give.
Did you see me?
Did you hear me?
Do I matter.
These are the things people really want.
People want to be present and have other’s be present with them.
It’s not an inexpensive gift in this noisy age however. It will take energy and time. If you want to re-train yourself back into presence, it does take time, but like most things, it is incredibly worth it.
Some think they want the next thing, and the next and the next…
An Australian nurse who spent several years caring for patients during the last 12 weeks of their lives asked the people what their regrets were.
From “The Top Five Regrets of the Dying” book by Bronnie Ware:
- I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
- I wish I hadn’t worked so much.
- I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
- I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
- I wish that I had let myself be happier.
How did you score?
What did these 5 things stir up in you?
Do you hear you?
Do you see you?
Do you think you matter enough to choose what matters most to you?
I see behind the curtain in people’s lives everyday in my business. I see the real deal behind the practiced facades, I see the yearning, the true desires, and the hunger for something real.
Our world has grown busy, noisy, and cluttered with so many things, people have been trained to have such a measly attention span and superficial set-point. A lot of the noise is there to fill a void in order to numb an annoying, subtle suffering.
It’s a vague suffering however. Nothing is “wrong” but something is also not right.
Everything is fine?
What is missing?
CONNECTION. TRUTH. PRESENCE.
Presence is connection.
The etymology (I am an etymology nerd) of presence is:
Middle English: via Old French from Latin praesentia ‘being at hand’, from the verb praeesse
“being at hand” which to me sounds like “being there.”
I would say my definition of presence would be the ability to “be with” something. A person, an animal, an activity, the moment.
Yes. The moment.
When we are zooming around in our minds, being “mind dominant,” we are rarely in the moment. We are in the traffic jam 2 hours ago still reeling with impatience, replaying opening the mail to find a bigger than usual bill earlier that week, or worried we don’t look good in our pants, or wondering what that person in front of us is thinking, or perhaps just checked out for no reason.
The moments pass. Another day passes, but were we even there?
Did we really feel the warmth of our child’s skin as we tucked them in, smell the crisp air of nature when we walked out the door, or taste our dinner, or truly let ourselves laugh when the dog was being super cute…
Are we here?
Presence is actually a gift we give to ourselves, that also gives to everyone else.
It’s a 2 for 1!!
We stampede into stores to not miss out on deals.
But do we stampede our meditation cushion, prayer practice, or self care routine that enters us back into the moment?
The moment is the only place where you will not miss out, because it’s all you have.
Presence is the ability to be here, in your body, in the moment without the noise running your life.
Everyone can have it. It is the thing underneath all the stuff.
I encourage you to set a reminder on your phone to begin training your mind and awareness to pay attention. Feel your senses. Notice the sounds and what is really going on around you. There is a reason mindfulness has become so popular, don’t be intimidated by the words meditation, mindfulness, yoga, etc… You don’t need to know these words, you just need to begin paying attention and being here.
So you can give Presence.
To learn how go to www.jennasmithcoaching.com
For Further Insight: