For some, the holidays are overflowing with joy, magic, connection, and love. A time to really be present with loved ones and to see family or friends when you may not have had the time during the normal hustle and bustle of the year. It is a time society lets you pause. Holidays cause work to halt, and to-dos are allowed to be put off until the New Year. How lovely! This article is not necessarily for you 🙂 Go enjoy your family and friends and truly be grateful, these are gifts. But, if you have all the things, and still feel like something is missing, read on.
Other people, are alone or want to be alone. They either do not have a family, or their family does not necessarily mean home. They cannot take time off of work, they might even work overtime in order to make some extra cash for the overspending during the holidays, or simply to make rent. They might have a family, but always need to be on, always need to manage the drama. The holidays mean stress, depression, and obligation.
Most people go home or gather together wherever feels most like home.
Which, lead me to the idea to write about home.
Whether you are deeply in love with your family and there are little hiccups that all family’s go through or your family means repressed trauma or drama and a ton of obligation, or you don’t have a traditional family at all; the feeling of home can actually be accessed no matter your circumstances, conditions, past happenings or inner beliefs.
What is fantastic about this concept is that you can feel home no matter what, and then enjoy the company of the people around you without feeling empty when they are not there, or you can feel home even though home isn’t home.
I believe home is a space within all of us.
A space we oddly do not go very often.
When we lock into this home space, this already here place, we can then deeply feel all of the other good stuff or have the resources to deal with the crap in order to not feel like it is too much or you are not enough.
Home is very cool.
Home costs nothing.
Home can never be taken away or tainted.
Finding home no matter where you are this Holiday:
You are home when you are breathing. Watch your breath with the wonder of a child opening their first present.
You are home when you stop thinking of the past or projecting into the future. You are here, and here is home. Think of the wonderful book (or movie) A Christmas Carol by Dickens, everything brought Scrooge back home to himself, to a connected, more kind human.
Your footsteps are home. Just think what you are walking on? The earth, where we all live, where we did not have to pay rent to be born, where we arrived and we were home.
You are home now, not when someone acts how you want them to act, or when you look the way you think you should look, or your house looks the way you think it should, or your kids act the way you think they should. Stop the shoulds, spend more time checking out what is here. It will amaze you when you get the hang of it. When the little voices in your head become quiet, and more of you becomes present. That is home.
There is a saying that hurt people, hurt people, if you come across those people this holiday, just dust off the hurt that got onto you, smile and come back home to yourself.
Everyone simply wants the same things on this home we call earth. We want to be seen, we want to be heard, we want to be loved. When we are home, we can do all those things for ourselves and then be capable to give them to others and recognize when others are giving it back to us, and receive.
People that are home, can make other’s feel home. Best gift EVER.
What makes you feel home?
For me it’s my cats, nature, connecting with loved ones (both friends and family), great ideas, music, creating, lifting weights, meditation and ceremony, space, good stories, exploring new things, beauty, and I am sure there is more.
Do more of what makes you feel home. Make your own list.
If you were to do a New Years Resolution, I would recommend this one goal.