Sometimes I lose belief. In myself. In my abilities. In a positive future.
It’s not just me.
If we’re honest for a moment, I think we all lose self-belief from time to time.
For me, those moments are fleeting now, but they used to haunt me and drag me down for weeks at a time.
I look at it like this: holding on to self belief is like simmering water on a stove… if we don’t keep that heat turned up, to just the right level, that liquid will lose its boiling point and go cold.
We have to keep our learning and development going at just the right level to keep our self-belief ‘warm’. That might encompass many things, depending on your preference.
Maybe it’s reading, or audio books. It might be training programmes or workshops. It might be direct 1-2-1 coaching with someone who’s walked the path before you.
And it’s not *just* about education – development also includes keeping our mindset and outlook in the best condition – meditation, hobbies, interests, exercise, good, old fashioned fun, family, love, just for starters.
We also need to find that fine line between low confidence and massive ego. Balanced self-belief bridges that gap. We don’t want to be so gung-ho that we lose our humility.
Sometimes, when people come to me asking for help with imposter syndrome, I remind them of how valuable it can be. I advise them never to get rid of it completely. A little dose of imposter syndrome can keep us grounded and encourage us to keep striving to be our best and serving this world to the best of our ability.
So, to bring us full circle, every now and then, my own self-belief dips. Even this week, it happened – the same week I was announced as a finalist in a prestigious national awards programme. The category? Most Inspiring Business Woman.
Crazy, isn’t it?
Who knows why our self-belief sometimes takes a battering? Maybe it’s hormones, or the state of the world, or something triggering us in our personal lives or business. Or social media. Clean up your Facebook feeds, people. Unfollow all those crappy, drama-filled posts you don’t need to be reading.
Whatever that cause, I do know we don’t need to stay there. At least, not for very long.
When it happens for me, I have various tools up my sleeve to help me build back up.
I read favourable media reports about me from my clippings library, or watch clips of yours truly in action on YouTube or on TV.
I go through my testimonials and recommendations on LinkedIn and on my website. I look at the trophy I was awarded with when I was named the UK’s Best Female Coach in 2018.
I hit Amazon and read reviews for my books. I scroll through some of the more popular posts I’ve shared on social. I read articles I’ve written for websites or magazines.
I remember the small wins. I read through messages from people who wanted to send thanks. I remember the people I’ve helped – the people who say they’re still alive because of me.
Look around you. The proof of your beauty and brilliance is everywhere!
It’s in the eyes of your lover, the smile of your kids, the positive reviews from your clients, hell, even in the loyalty and companionship from your dog.
It’s there. Sometimes we just have to find it.
When self-belief sinks, remember it doesn’t need to be a permanent step. Sometimes, we can actively control how long it stays down for.
Until next time,